Notting Hill Carnival is the one weekend a year when our part of west London belongs to somebody else's party. My mum was staying with us for a few weeks, it was the August bank holiday, and taking her anywhere near that on the Monday was never going to happen. So we did what sensible Londoners do when the city gets loud: we left. Bath is a couple of hours down the road. We booked a place two minutes from the centre and drove west with three generations in the car: my mum, my wife Tanvi and our daughter Tarini.
It was my second time in Bath and Mum's first. If you are visiting the UK for the second time or beyond and have still not been, put it on the list. Golden stone streets, a Roman bath that has been there for about 2,000 years, some of the best dessert I have eaten in England, and a centre small enough to walk end to end before the toddler needs a snack.
A word on logistics. Travelling as the only man with three girls, one of them two years old, means the real itinerary is not the sights. It is the question "where are we eating?", which arrives at 11am, again at 1pm, and roughly every twenty minutes after six. In a town where the good restaurants want a booking and the best ones will not take one, that question is less a question than a standing threat.
Getting there: two hours and one charge
We drove. From west London it is about two and a quarter hours on a clear run, and we made exactly one stop at the motorway services to charge the Tesla, stretch legs and buy snacks that were gone before we were back on the motorway. One stop with a toddler is a personal best. I am choosing to count it as a win.
Where we stayed: Apex City of Bath
We stayed at the Apex City of Bath Hotel on James Street West and got a genuinely good deal on a big room with two beds. With three generations sharing, room size is the difference between a holiday and a hostage situation. The location is the real selling point: about two minutes on foot to the centre, where the cafes, shops, restaurants and pubs are. With a toddler, being able to walk back for a nap without planning a route is worth more than any amenity on the list.
Dessert first, obviously
Bath has a dessert problem, in the best sense. Mrs Potts Chocolate House opposite the Abbey, Good Day Cafe, Choux Box: there are more good dessert places per street than any town this size has a right to. We worked through a few of them and, honestly, I have lost track of which one had the counter below. The triple choc brownie and the salted Biscoff pretzel blondie will tell you why I stopped taking notes.
Pulteney Weir, and the lunch I did not plan
Here is the one thing I got wrong. I did not pick a lunch spot in advance, which on a bank holiday in Bath is a rookie mistake. When the question came, I walked into the first pub we found, mostly because I wanted a pint more than I wanted a plan. We were fed. Nobody complained out loud. But decide lunch before you arrive: the good places fill up and you will not want to be wandering around with a hungry two-year-old.
Afterwards we walked down to Pulteney Bridge and the weir, which is the view on half the postcards in town for good reason.
A pint of Emperor at Bath Brew House
Late afternoon, the girls went back to the room to rest. Bath Brew House is right across the road from the hotel, so I did the responsible thing and went to check it out. It is a big place with a lot of open space, and it brews its own beer on site. The one on the wall that caught my eye was Emperor, a 4.4% pale ale, hoppy and citrusy. I had to try it, and it lived up to the poster. If you like a pale ale, you will not be disappointed.
Rain, and not one umbrella
The evening brought rain. Between four of us we had packed exactly zero umbrellas, which I would like to blame on someone else but cannot. The upside of Bath is that everything is close, the lanes are narrow and there is always a shop awning within sprinting distance. Pack an umbrella anyway. English weather does not care about your bank holiday.
Dinner at Chez Dominique, and that lemon meringue
Dinner was Chez Dominique on Argyle Street, just over Pulteney Bridge. It is a cosy French room with bare bulbs hanging from the ceiling, sage walls and tables close enough to feel warm rather than cramped. They had a high chair ready for Tarini, which bought us a full dinner without a single negotiation.
The food was good. The lemon meringue was something else. It is the best I have had, and I am not qualifying that. If you only book one dinner in Bath, book this one, and save room.
Eating in Bath with a toddler: the rules
Food in Bath is not expensive at all, and there are restaurants everywhere. The catch is that the good ones need a booking, and some of the best will not take one for the evening, so you queue. Solina Pasta on Grand Parade is the famous example: walk-in only, with a queue outside that is part of the scenery. Budget half an hour, or turn up early.
With a toddler, the rules are simple. Book dinner before you leave London. Decide lunch the night before. Carry snacks as if the town has none. And if one of your party is under three, eat when she is hungry, not when you are. The whole family's mood depends on it.
Coffee on Old Bond Street
The next morning started at WatchHouse on Old Bond Street, in a pale corner building with a clock on it that looks like it has been keeping time since the Georgians. Coffee outside in the sun, Tarini watching the street, Mum already talking about moving here. More on that in a minute.
The Roman Baths
We spent about an hour at the Roman Baths, which is the right amount of time with a small child. You buy a ticket, go in, and get a handheld audio guide: press the number next to each exhibit and it tells you the story. It is simple and very cool, and it means everyone can go at their own pace, which with three generations is the only pace that works.
The Great Bath is the photo at the top of this post: green water, stone columns, the Abbey rising behind it, and a terrace lined with statues of Roman emperors. It still fills from the hot spring underneath, as it has for two thousand years. Standing there, you get the history in a way no textbook manages.
For toddlers: leave the pushchair at the hotel. The Baths are not pushchair friendly. But once you walk down from the terrace, there are a lot of fun corners, steps and passages for a small person to wander. Tarini treated it as a very old, very large playground, and nobody seemed to mind.
Thermae Bath Spa: three floors, no phones
This is the part I have no photos of, and that is exactly the point. With Mum in town and happy to take Tarini, Tanvi and I escaped to Thermae Bath Spa. Phones and cameras are not allowed: you lock them away before you go up. No children either, since the minimum age is 16. Which is precisely why it felt like an escape.
It is three floors of heaven: pools, steam rooms, an infrared sauna, and water at a temperature that makes you forget what day it is. The highlight is the open-air rooftop pool. The sun was out, the whole city was laid out around us, and for a while there was no question about where anyone was eating next. If you go to Bath, you must go here. If you have a little one, bring a grandparent.
Shopping: indie labels worth the detour
Bath is a beautiful town to shop in. Lots of independent designers for kids' clothes, and good independent stores for men and women too, rather than the same high street you left behind in London. My find was Freedom of Movement on Argyle Street, a South African brand, where I bought an oversized tee. Very good store. Go in even if you think you do not need anything. You will.
The verdict: Mum wants to move there
The best review of the trip came from my mum. By the second morning she had decided she wants to buy a house in Bath and live there forever. I have not checked the property listings. I suspect she has.
One night was enough to do Bath well. Two would be better, especially if you want the spa and the Baths without rushing either. Book dinner before you leave, decide lunch early, pack an umbrella, and leave the pushchair behind for the Roman Baths. If it is a second or third trip to the UK and you have only seen London, Bath is the easiest upgrade you can make. For a longer family road trip, here is what happened when we drove all the way to Cornwall.